In the early years of my life-time, the society at least, still affirmed and had an understanding of the wife, mother and woman with those excellent qualities of the woman and wife given in the Biblical book of Proverbs 31. Today, society has ignored the principles of the model and standards described thereof and therefore left many women wondering what their roles in life, family and society are. God made men and women differently and I am sure He had good reasons and intentions. Women are not less than men, but they are different as they should be. Women are made of emotions and are nurturing by nature whereas men are strong physically and in most cases do not show their emotions quite as easily as women do. There are many similarities but each has some distinct and special traits that make them man or woman. God made us that way for some reasons.
Stop and think of the kinds of women we honor today! Who are the prototypes and who are the modern day super-women? If we were to design the perfect woman today, what would she be like? Today's woman is glamorous! According to
Let me explain my findings.She would work, she is building on her career, and therefore she demands and gets equal pay with men. There is nothing wrong with equal pay if she can do the same job as a man. In some cases, submitting to her husband would be out of the question, she would demand equality with him in everything. Submission does not mean being a hand-servant; rather it means she is to be his “help-mate”. The man should be the head of the household and the leader of the family; not the boss. This perfect woman of today has her own money and her own bank account and spends it as she likes. She might have an affair and a divorce if her needs
were not being met accordingly. Today's woman might even go as far as getting an abortion! She would be very independent. Her personal goals would always come first even if there were at variance with her children and her husband's needs. Today's woman hires in help for the house work and calls in designers to do the decorating. The family eats out or food is brought home as fast food. Cooking and cleaning are those things she would never think of doing. She works 8-10 hours a day. Her fulfillments would be her first priority. For this woman, it is “all about me and me alone”. This woman is a million light years away from the God fearing woman as described in Proverb 31.
How did we get here? Easy, the answer is the feminist movement. This movement has caused women to lose their real identity and sense of what a woman should be. Women were not meant to be like men, neither are they inferior, but are graciously different. They think differently, more emotional than physical, and compassionate by nature than men. Women have God given characteristics that make them women and never men. Just as men have characteristics that make them men, and not women.
For thousands of years, women that feared and reverenced God cut the picture of the virtuous and noble woman described in Proverbs 31.
These women knew this poem and taught it to their families. It was traditionally recited in the Jewish home every week on the eve of the Sabbath. Both the boys and girls knew this poem very well.
When we look at the woman described in Proverbs 31, we do not find a housewife rattled by the daily demands of being women nor do we find an over-achiever who has become hardened and one that leaves the family to fend for them.
Instead we find a caring, strong, elegant, dignified, multi-talented individual in her own right. This woman has investments, she has servants to keep busy and she also has real estate to manage. This woman is a partner to her husband and he trusts her completely with their goods, lands and property. She is his help-mate not his slave, his wife and the mother of his children and she knows who she is and understands what it means to be woman, wife, mother and citizen.
This woman has business skills, is charitable and kind. This woman energetically takes on new challenges and gains the respect of both her husband and her children. First and foremost, she looks to God’s will and not her own for her life and understands how only He can truly fulfill her needs.
I would now like to take you through each trait that this woman with noble character has, as shown to us in Proverbs 31. “This woman” is an ideal example of a woman.
Proverbs 31:10-31 (Translation from the Jewish publication society bible)
Pro 31:10 - A woman of velour who can find? For her price is far above rubies. The Hebrew word chayil, translated here "noble," or "virtuous" (KJV), means a wife of valor — a strong, capable woman with strong convictions
Pro 31:11 - The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, and he hath no lack of gain. Her husband trusts her to manage the family resources. She is industrious and adds to the family income.
Pro 31:12 - She doeth him good and not evil all the days of her life.
She is steady. She is both reliable and dependable. It does not depend on how she is treated by others.
Pro 31:13 - She seeketh wool and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
This woman enjoys working and plans ahead for what she needs in order to meet her responsibilities to her family.
Pro 31:14 - She is like the merchant-ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
This woman will not settle for the mediocre she goes the extra mile for quality and looks until she finds it and gets it for the best price.
Pro 31:15 - She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth food to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She understands good managers have a responsibility to take care of those under their authority. She leads by example.
Pro 31:16 - She considereth a field, and buyeth it; with the fruit of her hands, she planteth a vineyard. Her goals are not short term — she envisions the long-range benefits of her decisions she is not fickle nor dose she act on a whim. She thinks things through before making a decision.
Pro 31:17 - She girdeth her loins with strength, and maketh strong her arms.
She is healthy and strong by proper health practices and good diet, adequate rest and exercise.
Pro 31:18 - She perceiveth that her merchandise is good; her lamp goeth not out by night. She is self-confident and takes pride in doing a good job. Her family needs not to worry for her responsibilities are taken care of she has her priorities in order.
Pro 31:19 - She layeth her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
She develops her talents and hones her skills through education and diligent application. She really enjoys growing and learning new things.
Pro 31:20 - She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. She not only donates to the needy this means far more. This woman shows personal concerns. She visits the sick, and lonely folks she takes food to those in need.
Pro 31:21 - She is not afraid of the snow for her household; for all her household are clothed with scarlet. Providing clothing for her family is her responsibilities. She takes this seriously, and plans. She knows before the time comes when she is going to be needing shoes for the kids, winter clothes so she starts looking before hand. This gal plans ahead.
Pro 31:22 - She maketh for herself coverlets; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
This woman has high standards and dresses properly for the occasion. She does not need to show off. Her clothing does not need to draw attention from others. She knows it is not so much how she looks on the outside but on in side that truly counts.
Pro 31:23 - Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. His husband does not worry about what was going on at home because his wife takes care of the affairs there; his success was as much from her and their success came from the support of each other. She makes many of the day-to-day decisions concerning their property and goods. Her husband trusts her to manage their estate well.
Pro 31:24 - She maketh linen garments and selleth them; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. This woman has a business at her home. However, her efforts she adds to the family income. It is not about me it is about us.
Pro 31:25 - Strength and dignity are her clothing; and she laugheth at the time to come. This woman understands the benefits of being wise and diligent; she knows it holds lifetime benefits and rewards for her.
Pro 31:26 - She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and the law of kindness is on her tongue. She is well read and knows the facts. She can discuss anything. She is able to express herself intelligently, tactfully and diplomatically. Folks like to come to her for advice.
Pro 31:27 - She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. She is an organized, energetic person she gets things done.
Pro 31:28 - Her children rise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. She is not a doormat; she works hard to please her family. Her children honor her at home. Here we see the character of her husband as well. He teaches their children to respect mom and her virtues.
Pro 31:29 - Many daughters have done valiantly, but thou excellest them all.
This woman earns high praises for being extraordinary and a great role model.
Pro 31:30 - Grace is deceitful, and beauty is vain; but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Here we see the key to what makes this woman effective. Her priorities are determined by God’s will, not her own. Her real concerns are what God thinks, other than what others may think. Physical beauty and clever conversation are admirable qualities. This woman does not depend on outward beauty and charm for her success. She recognizes and understands completely her need for God.
Pro 31:31 - Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her works praise her in the gates. This woman is active; she works the walk and does not just give lip service. She does not have to boast about what her plans are for the future or her successes of the past. They are obvious.
No one woman has all these wonderful qualities of a Godly and virtuous woman as described here. Nevertheless, each one of us as a woman can look to her as our role model and permit God to shape and mold us into her likeness.
My intention here is not to make us feel bad about ourselves, but to shed light on what I believe women are suppose to be. My opinion is however, not based on man's standards, but upon God's standards according to His word. It is my heart desire to do what God says and to be at least, a shadow of this woman we see as a true woman of virtue. I wish this should be the desire of every fellow woman too!